There's something new that I've learned recently, which is how to be a stoic. Stoicism is one of the philosophical knowledges that I got after reading Fiolosofi Teras by Henry Manampiring's. Wait, philosophy? Some of you may be antipathetic when hearing the word philosophy. The illustration of an old man with a gray beard and a pile of books with boring theories immediately comes to mind when we hear this word. But, relax, probably you haven't known that Stoicism is very relevant with our everyday life. Mainly to maintain our mental health. Are you curious?
Stoicism began approximately 300 years BC (or about 2,300 years ago) and was brought by a rich merchant named Zeno who along his journey stranded in the city of Athens. Zeno became interested in learning philosophy from the philosophers he met. Then, he began to teach his own philosophy regularly on a pillared terrace (called "stoa" in Greek). Since then, his followers have been called "the Stoics" and his theory are called "Stoicism". In later times this teaching was further developed by other philosophers from Greece to the Roman empire.
Stoicism teaches humans to always apply virtues which based on this principle there are four main virtues, including wise in making decisions, fair in treating others, daring to hold on to the right principles, and being able to refrain from negative emotions. In addition, this philosophy is very universal, in fact it is very relevant to any belief.
One of the fundamental principles in this teaching and at the same time the most interesting in my opinion is the principle of the “dichotomy of control”. In simple terms this principle teaches that in life there are things that are under our control, there are things that are not under our control.
“Some things are up to us, some things are not up to us.” -Epictetus
At first glance this is something that we all know, but have we really understood and applied it? Here are the things that are in both definitions that I quoted from the Terrace Philosophy Book.
NOT under our control:
• Other people's actions
• Other people's opinions
• Our reputation/popularity
• Our health
• Our wealth
• Our condition at birth (gender, parents, ethnicity/ethnicity, skin color, etc.)
• Natural events (weather, earthquakes, etc.)
• And everything that is beyond the reach of our thoughts and actions
UNDER our control:
• Our considerations, opinions and perceptions
• Our wish
• In essence, everything that has to do with our thoughts and actions
Simply, if we obsess, expect too much, or place our happiness in things we have no control over, we will easily and often be disappointed. Stoicism teaches that true happiness can only come from "things we can control".
For example, when we have goals in a career such as a higher position in a company. To achieve this dream, what we can control is hard work, effort, maximum prayer. However, there are external factors that are beyond our control such as the boss's personal sentiments, jealous colleagues, the company's economic condition, etc. So, the promotion is something we can't control. This can also be applied to learning achievements, competitions, relationships, and socio-political conditions around us. Even our health and wealth are actually not things we can control. Although we can do our best to go to the gym every day to stay in shape, or work overtime every day to get rich quickly; but there will always be external factors beyond our control that can affect our health and wealth. For example, we are infected by a disease from our workmate, or we are cheated so our business goes bankrupt.
In essence, if we are really aware of the principle of dichotomy of control, then we can focus our energy and happiness on whatever is under our control so that we can achieve happiness and serenity. Meanwhile, if we only spend energy grumbling and cursing things that are beyond our control, then we will become angry, easily disappointed, and have emotional instability which will have an impact on mental health. So, this is where you start to relate, right?
“You have control over your thoughts – not what's going on out there. Realize this, and you will find strength.” -Marcus Aurelius (Meditation)
At first glance, Stoicism seems to teach that life should be "slowdown" only, not too responsive and not too passionate, but that's not really the case. Everyone who has stoicism, is still legitimate to have big dreams in life, and is passionate about always maximizing self-capacity to the highest peak. However, being stoic makes us as human beings aware of the dichotomy of control that makes emotions more stable and controlled. Even for me, this philosophical theory is very much in line with religious teachings, that in life there is a destiny that can be changed, and some cannot be changed. In life, after trying, then the next is "tawakal". And this is closely related to the popular phrase “Do the best, and let God do the rest.” But again, whatever the beliefs we profess, Stoicism is still relevant.
So, its really a new insightful knowledge for me. Furthermore, if anyone wants to understand Stosism more deeply, then I recommend Filosofi Teras by Henry Manurung (it's in Indonesian language tho). Happy reading, happy growing!
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